1/30 Mira Lo Que Hace

1/30  -  Mira Lo Que Hace

If I see something I want
... I hesitate.
I ask myself
... Do I need it?
(It sure looks good)
... Is it tangible?
(Can I put my hands on it?)
... Is it the right fit?
(Maybe it's too big or too small or one size fits all.)
I start thinking about
... All of the possibilities.
Not even worrying about the realities.
Am I ready?
Do I really want to go in that direction?
What if the reaction is not what I expected?
Am I too caught up in my own expectations?
What if my hesitation
... Is my defense mechanism?
My way if avoiding
... Rejection
... Disappointment
... Irrational thought in the spur of the moment

So
I just browse
Dream
Wishing
(That what I wanted, wanted me too)
Don't you dare leap, before you look
If I didn't
I just might jump.

© 2014 Sharbi3

Rearranged & Scattered

Thoughts scattered ...
Words arranged
in patterns
Yet tattered ...

In dog earred corners
Of notebooks strewn
On the floor

In a room of my brain
Repeating the same
Calling it new ...
deranged

Insane in the membrane

Banks filled with memories
Of allegorical stories
that relate to emotions
Complicated by strange

definitions
of how it was supposed to be ...

Mindlessly wandering
deserted
streets
looking for hearts
wetted with
Rain swollen eyelids
Trying to make them dry again
but they can't ...

Cuz like a champ its got a record
In five minutes and four seconds
Nevermind the boogie down reference ...

My mind spray like Egyptian
hieroglychics
Saturating limestone in tombs
Cuz the room
Its empty

Filled with memories of times long passed ...

Counting down
the unwound clock
Time.
still.
moves.
forward.
Like the sun also rises
These words
they despise
The truth
Cuz it's the truth ...

And honestly, honesty
However cliche
Is the best policy

So these books ...
Scattered on hardwood floor
next to the door jam
Nestled there
being kicked around
and swept.by dust
Contain all the words.that were supposed
to be said
but instead
were felt
Now the heart
that wanted to express
those words
Never did ...

So in the tangled mess
on the floor
Are all.the words left unsaid
Yet spoken
Through pen
bleeding red ...

© 2013 Sharbi3

Same song, New tune

It screams from beyond
Not willing to succumb to
Mere memory
No
It wants to be in the here and now

Presently

Like the incessant ring
Of an old rotary phone
No matter how much you try
to ignore it
Ring ring ring
is the dial tone

Awakening
out of a once forgotten
Time
Creeping into the light
Appearing to once dimmed eyes
Bright
Sitting there
Waiting to be acknowledged
No matter how many covers
You try to shadow it
Peeking out 
It wants its
Limelight
No mere fifteen minutes of fame
Not enough of hands in pocket
shrugged shoulders
Head hung low
No shame
Reality
left back in the long ago
The past keeps creeping
like the bungling
Burglar
It lifts the window

Letting in air
Venting a stale room
Opening
Retrieving memories
Once held securely
Like jewels in a treasure box
Locked
stashed
Placed
neatly
on a shelf
Old photo albums
Forgotten smells
Only time
held onto
Will tell
Truth
reality
regret
Change
While time moved forward
There
it still remains
In the forefront
Not willing to let you forget
The past
has become the present
This was not
how it was meant

People grow
Some stay stuck
Some let time
stand still
Unable to release
the muck
The murky
Blurry vision of dreams once held
A promise forgotten
A spell rendered
Like the needle
on a broken
record
It keeps spinning
Drowning out the sounds
Repeat on lock
Stop skipping
Stop repeating
It's time
for a new song.
Tick tock.
©sharbi3 2013